Monday, March 27, 2017
The art of compromise. There are similarities to looking for that perfect house and your hubby to be. Every diva have a ginormous wish list. Of course every girl would want the house or the man of her dreams. Four bedrooms (1 guest room, and 1 office, 1 walk in closet absolutely diva fabulous and yes, one bedroom for the bride and groom). The hubby to be, oh you would like him to be handsome, educated, have a good job and of course eyes only for you. But at the end of the day, every diva has to choose the house that has most of the things on her wish list or at least some of the items that were high on “the must have” section.
There are women who feel that you shouldn’t have to settle for the not so perfect house, or not so perfect spouse. I agree to an extent. The million dollar home is out of my budget and Denzel Washington is already married. What’s a girl to do? Every major decision we make will have an effect on our life, so we must make them carefully and prayerfully. This is not a “one size fits all” deal – not by any means. But it is and will always be a matter of compromise. No house or person is perfect. Inspections and conversations are necessary. We have to do our due diligence. It starts with knowing ourselves and knowing what we don’t want, just as much as what we do. What are the deal breakers? Three bedroom may be just right for one person, while someone needs 4 bedrooms and that’s before the children come along. There are lots of questions to ask and you need to get answers so you could make an informed decision. Some of those answers have to come from you.
At the end of the day, we have to come to a decision – we have to make the best choice given numerous factors in our lives. But when it is all said and done, we have to make that house a happy home and that relationship a strong marriage partnership. So, unfortunately diva’s this time I only have questions, not answers. But answering your questions truthfully and honestly is the best way for you to get closer to your dream home or hubby. Understand what will make you happy and then… go for that. But just know, comprise is always necessary. It’s a natural part of life.
Saturday, March 25, 2017
Want to get in shape? Well, besides eating well, exercising is a very important step in the process. A simple way to exercise is put one foot in front of the other. Walking is the simplest form of exercise, but quite effective. We need to get moving and we need regular reminders to do it – why? Well, because most divas may not necessarily like exercising - there, I said it. We have to live in our truth sisters. Now that doesn’t mean we don’t. We are smarter than to think that we should only do things that we love. No, we are all aware of the fact, that divas, like everyone else, must do things that are good for us - whether we like it or not.
If you haven’t already done so, you need to buy a Fitbit. If you haven’t, what are you waiting for, they are awesome. It’s a wonderful step tracker, but it’s much more than that. It also tracts your heart rate and it can track your calories, water intake, exercise and so much more. It’s amazing. If you have friends who have Fitbit, you can challenge each other and see just how your girlfriends are moving forward towards their exercise goals.
What I really love about my new Fitbit (charge 2) is, you can purchase alternate bands, some of which are really bracelets, so you can still be fabulous from head to toe even when tracking and getting regular reminders to literally, “keep it moving”. Get on Amazon, Ebay or somewhere and pick your fav tracker and buy it today. Oh, I must show you mine. Bam…
Wednesday, March 22, 2017
Don’t be too busy for yourself. In the process of bringing home the bacon and frying it up in a pan, do your life’s work. It makes no sense to be too busy to take care of you. In our personal life, just like in business it’s all about prioritizing and time management. But by all means, do you. There is nothing more important than your own well-being. Am I saying to be selfish absolutely – at least sometimes. We are caregivers – that’s what we do, it’s not who we are. We are women with one life, use it wisely. Take nothing for granted and don’t waste time. Don’t confuse wasting time with relaxing. We do that too, we act like if we take a break the world will fall off its axis, well it won’t. Wasting time is spinning your wheels or doing stuff that don’t require your attention. Resting is giving your body and soul what it needs, a minute to shut down and rejuvenate.
Take time out of your busy schedule, to do things for you. How about that life work, your budget, a walk in the park, going back to school. Take a minute to smell the roses. You don’t need anybody’s permission to be happy and follow your dreams. Give yourself permission to be the diva that you are. When mama’s good, everybody is good and the opposite is also true. You would be surprised how much more you can accomplish during the same period of time, when you are rested and happy. Set some goals and begin to work on them. Make it happen, make it happen today diva.
Sunday, March 19, 2017
It may seem easier to give in to feeling weak and throwing in the towel. What do I mean, when you feel that you lack the energy or willingness to put in the effort, you know is necessary, to take you where you need to go. Life is a journey, if we are lucky – it’s a long one. Doing anything for a long time can be tiring and leave us feeling weak and worn. After all, everything takes energy and some things takes lots of it. So what’s a girl to do, you ask? Anything and everything necessary to keep running your race.
To different people it may mean doing different things. I simply may need more sleep, while the next guy needs to start taking vitamin supplements, the diva down the block may need to start exercising regularly. And your cousin well, she may need a whole new rotation of friends. You know, people who are not just sitting around saying “woe is me”. Instead, people who are challenged, motivated and eager to find solutions to the problems and roadblocks that comes with simply being alive. When an athlete looks at the track ahead and thinks, “I’ll never make it” – game over. If you think you can’t, the universe will accept what you have spoken into existence as a fact. There is power in the tongue as much as there is in your thoughts, especially since your body responds to what you accept.
And if by chance your lack of energy is directly correlated with a particular place in your journey, then change it. If you feel that your journey is long and dreary, then let the sun in. Remember that we are the rulers of our destiny. With the exception of Devine intervention, we have the most to do with where we are and where we are going. So if you don’t like where you’re headed – then change it. We will always find the strength to do what we love to do, make sure you love it or change your destination. And while your on your journey, don't forget to take time to spread a little love and good cheer. It's the gift that keeps giving.
Saturday, March 18, 2017
If I can speak to the brothers for a minute, I’d like to give you the inside scoop on “what a girl needs”. If you are trying to step to a diva, you have to bring your “A” game. See, divas have worked hard all day ‘err day. They have worked to improve themselves. They bring to the table the best they can be both mentally, physically and financially. They are patient and kind and will stand by your side like an eagle over her eggs. She has big goals for her future and she can certainly get behind yours.
If you’re playing games brother, miss her. Loose her number and forget her name. Deny any knowledge of her existence. Because trust and believe, that is what she will do to you. It may sound harsh, but let me explain. Divas are forthright and upfront. You’ll know from day one who she is and all about her belief system. The reason she is so honest and upfront is, she believes everybody has the right to choose. She believes, it takes away your right to make an informed decision when she plays games and hides. She’s an open book, and she expects the same – it’s only fair. She lives her life honestly, her love life is no different. So if you want to know “what a girl needs,” she needs honesty. She needs a man that knows how to treat a woman and is about his own life. And if you’re not there yet, that’s okay, you’ll find your Ms. Right. This girl, however, may not be the one for you. There are lots of women out there, she is sure you will find your soul mate. She wishes you well.
Wednesday, March 8, 2017
What can possibly be more important than family and peace? Peace of mind, peace in our home, peace in our country and peace in our world is paramount. Certainly we can all agree that this ranks high on our list of must haves. But if we agree, then we must admit to ourselves that there must be some type of action on our part to aid and ensure the sustainability of both.
We say our family is important, but do we take the time to make sure we keep those wonderful connections. Do we call people, make arrangements to meet and spend time - probably not as much as we should. I believe it's important to live life without regrets. In this situation, that means doing your part so that later you don't feel bad that you didn't try harder to keep your family close. We are all equally responsible for doing what we can to keep those sticks bundled. It doesn't really matter what could be potential obstacles. Where there is a will, there is always a way. So make it a point of business to have that family dinner, family outing and family vaca. You can't remember the memories you never took the time to make. Make certain you make memories every opportunity you get, live without regret.
Oh, and what about that peace thing. Well, you control your immediate environment, so make sure peace starts there. Agree not to argue. Is that possible you ask, of course. Everything is about decisions. We can choose to make healthy decisions to ensure we have peace in our homes. We don't always have to agree with our husbands or children, but we can choose to respect each other and discuss our opinions and disagreement without raising our voices and saying hurtful things to each other.
We can certainly pray for our country and do whatever we can to make peace a priority. Like everything else in life a serious effort for success is required. What are you willing to do to ensure family and peace remain front on center diva? Whatever it is, start now. There are no guarantees about tomorrow. Live like you know.
Friday, March 3, 2017
You’ve had it, you’re leaving – fine. But don’t just run out, have a plan. Whether you are leaving a failed relationship or a job, having an exit plan is the best way to go. No matter what’s going on, don’t just pick up and leave. If you do that, you’re hurting yourself more than anything. I’m not advocating for staying in a failed situation. I am saying make good decisions, good choices and know what you’re doing before you do it.
If you’re in a failed relationship and you run out the door, there is a good chance that you are going to spend a lot more than you planned to. Since you didn’t have an exit plan you can go through what little cash you have quickly. However, if you decided you leaving in two months and you began to save, research where you’re going to live and know the cost of your expenses – you will be in a much better financial position. You don’t need the added burden of finances combined with an already bad situation. And, if you are married, knowing your legal rights is important before you do anything. In some cases, it’s best to stay and go through the court system to bring closure to a failed relationship. Either way, be informed.
If you want to get out of a negative situation at work, don’t just storm out. Don’t ruin your reputation or your finances. Nobody at work, and nothing that’s happening there, should be more important to you than paying your bills and taking care of yourself and your family. Besides, it’s never a good idea to burn a bridge. Your next job will surely ask for a reference and “she walked out” is not, I repeat, is not what you want them to hear diva. Plan your exit. Save your money, tighten your resume, interview and land your next job before you leave. You worked too hard for your career to have it ruined over foolishness. Leave the company in the best shape you can, be the bigger person.
Lyons rarely run from a fight, but if you must exit – do it wisely, have a diva plan.